Ok, yeah, why do I want to torture myself? Whahaa…
Yeah be happy. Even if things don't go my way. Even if things never seem to be right for me.
Smile!!!
I shall not be bothered by events. I shall remain me.
Over the past few years, I have been stupid enough. Do I want to continue with this stupidity? Come on, change direction, look elsewhere, and stop dreaming. Welcome to reality.
Letting go, in order to look for alternatives. Giving up, in order for chances to appear.Moving on, in order to be me.
I have tortured myself for the past few years. Enough.
More of my belief:
I always believe that, whatever people choose to tell you, is what they want you to know. Yes, people hide facts. Who doesn't? Things they don't want you to know, they will keep quiet and hope that you will never find out about it. But the thing is, when you have finally found out about it, it can turn into a bad incident somehow. And then, people start blaming each other, and things may turn from bad to worse…
War… is bad…
And there's the question about trust. How many people do you trust in your life? People, as in friends?
Most of the time (last time), I trusted all my friends. I trust that, they will automatically pay me back the money they owe me. I trust that, they will keep their promise. I trust that, if I tell them things about myself, they will be truthful and tell me things about themselves.
I am so wrong. So wrong.
People ran off, keep quiet, act blur, without returning me my money. (I don't mean $1, $5, $10. Those are considered not-that-big sum. Usually I will forget these money until people suddenly remembered to pay me back.) People forgetting this and that, and people with lots of reasons. (valid or not, I shall not comment.) People hiding information here and there.
But I cannot really blame them. It's my fault. I accept all the wrongs. Forgive them.
Then I ask myself, should I let go of them?
… … …
No way!
A friend for me means a friend for life. No matter how infrequent you contact me, or I contact you. No matter what wrongs you have done to me. No matter how deep you have left a scar on me. No matter how many times my heart has been stabbed, you will always be my friend.
I am a Dog. I am destined to trust people, and to gain their trust. I hate to be alone. I like to do things in groups. I need lots of love. Once I feel I am not loved, I will tend to fall sick easily.
I am Aquarius. Eccentric at times. Sometimes temperamental and unpredictable. But what to do? That's me.
I believe that I should really move on. From this moment. On this day. A change.