Hello 2014

Hello world!

It’s been a while since I updated stuffs here. It’s the first day of 2014, so I am thinking of writing something.

2013 has been quite a fast year for me. I have been moved up the ranks, and currently sits on a position that I am still not very comfortable in.

As I informed my boss when he broke the news to me, I do not have a big head, so don’t give me such a big hat to wear.

My comments went on deaf ears. I am still being pushed into the position. After almost 1 year, I am still not very comfortable in that seat.

Many moments, I have thought of giving up, as this is not the path I have wanted. I am an implementer, not a commander. I am better at doing things than telling people what to do. I do not have sufficient experience to tell people what to do yet.

And I hate to mislead people. I hate to bring people in a circle, only to realise that my previous decision was a bad one.

Going in circles, who likes it?

However, I think I am going to give myself another chance to try. To lead, to guide, and to mentor.

It’s difficult, I know. But, I don’t have much choice, do I?

My passion is still in programming, in web-based applications, in finding alternative solutions to problems.

Holding this position has placed my passion in the back seat. I lost my passion for my job.

I used to go out and play. Now, I go to work.

And that’s sad.

2013 has also been quite unfruitful, in terms of work. I realised that we were like in a washing machine, jumbled up together, without a very clear direction.

We need someone to point us in the correct direction. But, I am not ready for that role. And, I don’t see anyone that is able to do that yet. Yes, I believe I have a strong team. I need a strong leader. And that leader, is not me.

2013 has also been unhealthy. I have gone to drink with friends and colleagues more often. More late nights. Lots of beers and liquors. Less time on weekends.

It’s very bad.

The last quarter of 2013 has also been an interesting one. I found The One. You will not believe how we met. We talked via whatsapp. We went out for dinner. We went on long trips. We have even gone overseas.

It’s great to love, and to be loved.

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2014, what is going to happen?

Work-wise, I hope it will be smooth.

Love-wise, I hope it will be great.

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And, to set some resolutions for 2014…

Love my body

Yes, I am heavy! I want to just cut down on weight, and maintain my size-L shirt sizing, for now. How? Eat healthy, and drink less alcohol!

Love my close people

I love my gf! Starting a relationship is relatively easier than maintaining a relationship. How to make a relationship last? This is a question that I need to learn. Or rather, WE need to learn. It’s not easy too, but I believe that we will be able to do it!

I love my parents! Without them, I will not be who I am now. So, I must take good care of them!

I love my friends! Without them, I will not have the support that I require now and then. So, I must keep in touch often!

Love my job

In order to deliver the project, I need to love my job, and somehow, make the others love it as well. I cannot be the only one chionging and chionging.

We need to chiong together!

So how? I need to set some clear directions, most probably. Before that, I myself will need to be clear first. And this is also not easy.

Love my life

For 2014, I hope I will be able to optimize my time, spend quality time at work and at play, and enjoy life.

For 2014, I hope I can spend more time for doing what I love during non-working hours.

For 2014, I hope I can still be myself.

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Alright, that will be enough, for now? LOL. It’s been some time since I wrote such a long post eh? I wondered who will read this, but nevertheless, Happy 2014, everyone! May 2014 be a lovely year!

 

 

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Revival?

Maybe… this place needs to be revived…

Let me think about it first…

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What Went Wrong?

Sometimes, I really wonder, what went wrong.

A wrong interpretation. A combined effect. A combination of events happening together.

Can’t I put all into 1, and just write it as one? Why must people look at the context, and assume that they are linked? Why can’t people listen to explanation?

Indeed, I am sadden.

If a friend lets go of me, what do I do? Do I let go, or continue to hold on?

No. I let go. I have learnt to let go.

……………………

我也不知道是为什么. 头很痛. 心更痛. 我到底做错了什么? 一段好好的友情, 怎么会变成那样?

一次好心的问题, 既然能演变成那么复杂的东西.

怎么人们都看不见我所看到的东西呢? 怎么人们都以为自己是对的, 然后就铁定他们的想法和作为是对的呢?

怎么这样?

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坏男孩

天啊,我最近好坏哦。 花钱就像是流水般的自然,一点也不犹豫。 也报了名,学 class 2B, 还在一肚子气,忍无可忍的情况下,做了个决定,买了一件超贵的东西 (但是,我觉得,那是我应该买的)。

好了,2012年4月将走进历史。 五月即将来临。 也该是整理和收拾好一切的一切, 从新出发。 把大部分的精力都放在值得的东西上吧! 把所有的错化成力量! 把所有的误会,不了解,愤怒,不愉快丢掉!

别在浪费时间了。

Lk version 5.0. More resilient than before.

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Fishing Joy

It’s been some time since I last updated.

As usual.

Anyway, went on a fishing trip yesterday! Andrew, Lim Teck, Josephine, and I. 4 people, on a little boat, and out we went. It was a whole day thingy, and we came back looking like lobsters.

First location was the breakwater just outside the yacht club. Some fishes here and there, but due to the proximity to the wall, we changed location after a while.

Second location was another breakwater further west. That was where we got the most fish.

Third location was some area where we did something in the past… No fish. Too deep, and current’s too strong, maybe.

The rest of the locations were more like sight-seeing drives. We went all the way to CNB bouy 4, and all the way North, and voila! We saw the Changi Exhibition Centre, and also SFT, Tekong, etc…

The weather was OK the whole day, wind, and sun. And all of us got sunburnt.

Zzz…

Overall, it was a nice experience, to be fishing out at sea. LOL.

More trips to come, I guess!

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More and More Sianz…

Work, is getting boring nowadays.

Or, maybe I am tired of things. Can’t find any motivation.

Yet.

Sometimes, I wonder, what am I doing? This is not the direction that I want. Or rather, there’s no clear direction.

Just when I have found my direction, something will come and steer me towards another direction.

I am being blown by the wind.

I want to stay put longer. I want to clean up things that are not cleaned previously. I don’t want to leave doubts behind.

I want improvements.

Sometimes, from what I see, my work is like a FYP. Do for 1 year, and then forget about it. Maybe some people will treat things that way.

That’s not the way I want it.

I do 1 thing. I come up with version 0.2 a few months later. I come up with version 1.0 1 year later. I come up with 2.0 in another 6 months.

Improvements. Not wait for problems to surface. As time goes by, people sure can foresee problems.

Foresee? Then improve.

If not, be prepared to suffer.

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Missed this… Missed that…

Sianz…

Why I always missed out the small things…

Not say that, I missed out all the small things. It’s like, I watch all the small things, and 1, just 1 of it, goes past unnoticed.

-.-

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“Contribution” to Work…

Hmm… my goodie bluetooth stereo headset has failed to power up!

I used that headset for work, in order to hear better out there. Now, it’s (almost) gone.

So who is going to compensate me that that? No one.

No one, except myself.

I have just bought a new one today! LOL!

And maybe, when I have got the time, I will send the old one for a full body checkup, and see if it can be repaired. I have asked, and the person told me that the service center is in Jurong Point.

Not bad.

If that can be repaired, then the “contribution” continues. I am not going to use that new one for work. No!

Bleah.

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On Emails, and Such…

One thing for sure, usually, when you are in the cc loop of an email, it means that most probably, the email contents are linked to you in one way or another.

One thing for sure, usually, when you are not in the cc loop of an email, but suddenly you are in it, it means that most probably, you have been dragged in.

One thing for sure, removing someone from a cc loop without informing, is a no-go.

Something to hide?

There are many things, called ‘knowledge’, around.

There are also many things, which are categorized accordingly.

1) Must know.

2) Need to know.

3) Good to know.

4) Can don’t know.

If you are in the cc loop, most probably the category is around 2 to 3 most of the time.

Crap.

LOL.

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Nevermind… Be Nice…

Ok, I have decided to be nice guy.

I decided that all are not G.O.D. They did not know what had happened. They did not understand everything. It’s not their fault. It’s my fault for not telling them the full story, be it they listen or not.

I decided that I should just do whatever I have been tasked to do. I shall clean up the shit.

I decided that I shall be nice. This time.

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Think: firefighters catching fire…

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One small problem, big hooha.

I shall be nice. This time.

No, I shall not bite back.

I shall be nice. This time.

No, there are other people who really know what happen. The truth.

I shall be nice. This time.

No, I am handling too much things. Too much.

I shall be nice. This time.

No, I am not G.O.D. No.

I shall be nice. This time.

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