It’s nice to block out all nonsense from my ears, and blast the music at crazy volume, and just look at my computer screen. I did not care what’s happening around me, and I did not really want to know. I just want to hide in my own world for a while, to stone, to really complete what I wanted to do.
Work, is something that I think I can do. Others, I think I can forget it.
And so, I listed to Linkin’ Park, Jocie, Jay, and Mayday, and then some instrumental albums, and stared at my screen non-stop for hours.
And I still did not manage to finish what I wanted to finish.
Stayed at YC till around 8pm. Trouble-shooting shit once again. It’s so fun to do things when the sun goes down, and everything gets dark eventually, and you risk all sorts of things like insect bites, slippery floors, items placed on the floor but were too dark to be seen, etc.
Went to bukit panjang. Was too sianz to be always taking cab at tanah merah to go home, and somemore alone. It’s already sianz enough, no thanks. And so, ate alone at LJS. The stupid timing was too stupid to find a makan buddy.
It’s hard to find makan buddies nowadays. Everyone has his/her priorities.And maybe, it’s my fault too: I keep finding the wrong buddy.
I was so sianz, that I decided to eat in. Ate the sawadee set. Ok la… tasted like tomyam…
And then, took cab home, alone. Sianz.
Maybe that’s what I am good at: being alone.
Tomorrow… more shit. I am not looking forward to tomorrow. It’s not just tomorrow. It’s every tomorrow. I feel so unmotivated. I feel so tired. I feel so sianz. I feel so unhappy. I feel so irritated. I feel so pissed. I feel so sad.
See… so negative. This, is the real Lk, maybe. With so much negative thoughts, I wonder how I still managed to smile everyday…
How fake.