Belief@HazelCafe

Hmmm…

It looks like… I am really… cock. Simple things also can miss. But at least someone spotted it before the big guy. Great job, genius. LOL…

Alright then, back to office! And back to the design phase!

T. M. Y…

Wahahah…

Just now, someone used a “brownie formula”, and made some brownies with her sis, and brought them to the bbq. Wahhh…

Hmm… not bad actually, just that, they don’t really look like… erm.. brownies, but otherwise, it’s good!

And it soooooo makes me wanna try baking something again. Just 2 weeks ago, I was actually thinking of grabbing a packet of pre-mix from one of the shelves at Giant, but was against the idea as I think I will not have the time to do so.

Hmm…

Or should I go dig out the maki recipe? I forgot where I have kept them… duhz.

Or… maybe, I should just do nothing. Wahaha!

Anyway, I kept the remaining brownies in the fridge. Yaa… I must remember to drink lots of water!!! Or else, I am going to lose my voice soon.

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Ok, outing at pasir ris park was good! We had a good laugh now and then. Nearly got stomach cramps. Then, we played some crazy card games, with the remaining food as forfeit. Wahliew… LOL but effective in clearing all the food.

And yes, thanks to jojo and bf (oh man, what’s his name again? Zzz) for preparing the stuffs. Hahaha…

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Went for tennis with lionel in the morning. 9am. Played till 11+, and then went to have a rest at SRC. The sun was super hot today! Shared a 1.5L H2O, and then ya kun. Didn’t know that they actually opened a branch there. The ice cream’s gone! LOL… I wondered how they survived over the years.

Was too tired to go for the outing at ecp, and so, I stayed at home to rest a bit, read a bit, and sleep a bit. I really need sleep sometimes.

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Sometimes, I think, if I do things with a bit of hatred, and a bit of sadness, and a bit of coldness, I get things done more effective.

That was how I got the high score in bejeweled in the morning. I think.

That was how I managed to hit the balls properly in the morning. I think.

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What to do later leh??

Sleep? Yeah. Most probably.

Emo entry time…

The time is 2340. Eating my dinner now.

I have just finished the cup of coffee. I decided to go out and get myself another drink. Got myself a hot cup of chinese tea. 铁观音. Bitter.

Ate my dinner. Slowly. In front of the computer. And think. Why am I like that?

I have been wondering, how come, I always feel that, I am being treated differently? How come, I feel that, I am being left out of something. How come, I feel that, I am alone?

Why, I see certain things happening between people, but these things don’t happen between me and others? Why, I see certain reactions, but such reactions are not seen when I am in the picture. Why, I feel certain things, but such feelings are just, simply, my own feelings?

Why?

Why am I trying so hard?

Can I just revert back to the cold heartless Lk?

How come, I always feel that, I have a kind of aura around me, in such a way that, people are just scared of me?

Am I that scary?

How some, I always feel that…

Enough. I am sad.

Sad, the way things have become. Sad, the way things do not go the way I want them to be. Sad.

Just sad.

Because. I am different.

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Sometimes, I think, why am I working so hard? Why all  the shit goes into my mailbox? Why not others?

Why?

Unless I find a very good reason, I will be so unmotivated. Not even the bonus can motivate me. No. I need to find something. I don’t know what, but I need to find something. Something that, I lack, or need.

I am just uber pissed, having more than 10 PRs bouncing around, and arrows to raise more PRs with limited/missing/outdated information. I am just like an idiot, spending more time on things that are all outside my main scope.

Why other people can have the privilege of being more free than me.

Why…

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I am so unmotivated. I used to finish up a section of code within half an hour. Now, a day. I used to finish up what I was supposed to do over the weekend. Now, I wait for Monday to arrive.

Now, I wonder, if I should go back on Saturday, to finish up that programming.

I will think about it.

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Later’s plan? Supposedly, I have tennis session at 9am. After that, supposedly, I have some outing at 2pm. Supposedly, I have a bbq at 5.30pm. I am still thinking.

I shall see how alive I am, later.

I am already running on backup battery. And that battery is running low.

I need to recharge.

Aye… home… half an hour ago.

I walked home. Yes.

Went to Marina Square for dinner. Waraku. tyh, roger, my, and me. Had this dunno-wat cold noodles that tasted like dunno-wat. And was there an increase in the price of mango? So thin on the sushi.

Yeah… Not too happy with the food. But still edible. I practically eat anything, no matter how bad it is. I don’t really like to waste food. I am not very particular about food, and so, I can get touched easily by food, whenever I had something that is way above my expectations.

Spent some time staring at how people spend their money at the bear catching machines. Reminded me of the good old days in primary school, when my friend and our mothers will hop over to Ginza Plaza to play. Last time, there was this UFO Catcher machine. I had quite a few bear bear from that kind of machine. But now, I wondered where had my bears gone to? Garang guni? Maybe?

We did try to play a few rounds, but we failed. We need more capital. Heh…

Spent crazy time waiting for a taxi. The cab that was confirmed never appear. We were at the taxi stand near waraku. We looked at the queue, and decided to go some other place instead. We ended up at the ‘north bridge road taxi stand in front of capitol building’. Yes, a taxi stand, but you won’t know where’s the queue, as there isn’t any. Most people were frantically dialing away on their phones. There’s this notice board, which listed all the numbers of the taxi companies. We tried calling. I got a ‘all cabs are busy’ and got hung up. She’s more lucky: she managed to get a cab, but the cab failed to appear. Dotz…

Then a cab came. The driver said ‘bukit merah’. I said ‘delta ave’. He said ‘ok’. We got on the cab. I failed to psycho him to go teban. LOL. Ended up at delta somehow. The driver was very kind to offer to drop me somewhere nearer to the main roads. For free. Seldom got such things happening, and so, I thanked him, and he dropped me at the junction of jalan bukit merah.

I gave up on cabs, when I was a group of people waiting for cabs at one side, and MORE people waiting for cabs on the other! So, I resigned to fate, and decided to walk. To the bus stop la! Took 197, which was comfortable and fast. A bit too fast though. I had not even read 3 chapters of the book, and the bus was already approaching jurong town hall road.

Sometimes, I love taking buses at night. Fast and furious. LOL.

Alighted, and walked. Decided to make a detour to NTUC. Yes, the NTUC near my house opens 24 hours. Wahaha… see la, ulu places also got such services… I went in and grab a bottle of pokka carrot fruit juice. Yummy. Then continued to walk home.

See… I walked home, didn’t I?

Was trying hard to keep my eyes open while walking. Dry, tired eyes.

Duhz…

The moon’s bright tonight. So bright that, I could not see any stars. Or maybe, town area’s too bright. I could see a few stars while I was walking home. Stars… shiny shiny… Lalala…

Ok, I am starting to type nonsense. Time to sleep.

More to say, but I shall keep them for next time.

I have not been writing, because… simply, I have been lazy!!! And also, I have other things to do, like… bejeweled? LOL…

Anyway, Sunday was tennis day as usual. I am gradually restoring my tennis sessions, after my toopid back felt better. But then, the condition is sometimes good, sometimes bad. Like the weather, but not totally like the weather.. you know.. complicated. LOL… Tennis was at 3pm, and I played until around 5pm.

Took a bus back to JE. Walked to the specs shop, and asked specifically for freshlook contact lens. Bought the green ones. $40 per pair leh.. quite ex lor. But for fun, I think, ok la… Tried them on monday. They fit! Yay!

And I looked like a vampire throughout the day.

But then, actually, it people don’t really stare at me, they will not really notice the difference. The green colour is not that obvious under dim lightings. I think, when I look at my eyes via a mirror, I think they are quite scary. Wahaha… that is, if I stare long enough. But then, why will I keep staring at myself in the mirror? Siao?

Alright, coloured contact lens are quite fun la… maybe I go buy the blue ones next time… wahaha…

Try mah… and be a bit more yo~~~

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Been eating like crazy ever since pay day. Monday was Crystal Jade. Tonight was Ichiban. Well well… LOL YUMMY STUFFS!

And yes, I did a toopid thing. I bought snacks to office, in my bag, and I brought them back again, in my bag. WTH… But luckily they are light stuffs. If not, I will be so @#&)(()!*!@…

K lar… time to sleep. Zzzz…

And why am I awake? LOL…

Because, I was watching tv… and felt too tired to come into the room around 11+, and so, just sleep on the sofa lor… And then, now then wake up. Waahha… shiok ar…

Only 1 blinking light on the screen when I came in. Someone replied. Lol… and most people are offline. Those that are online, are, well, always online.

Hmmm…

Went for tennis in the afternoon! Before that, met chris at queensway. I was supposed to be there ‘before 2pm’, but I ended up reaching that around 2.20pm. Cabs don’t appear when you need them. And then, I went straight to spectacle hut to buy my 1 year supply, and bought something that irritated my eyes, even though I liked it very much.

My eyes. They are very particular. They can wear only Soflens38. LOL!!!

Or maybe, if I am free enough later, I shall go to another shop, and try some other things…

Hmmm…

Ok, not much time left, and so, we zoomed off to NUS after my mini shopping spree. Huahui was also there. And so, played… until 5+, and then, home.

Watched TMNT just now… lol… and I got reminded me of the long-long-ago days, when the 4 of us took a cab. I think we were going to vivocity for dinner, before our PPCDL class. This joker taxi driver called us ‘ninja turtles’. Wahliew… Wahaha! He did not go on to talk about who’s who leh…

I duno also, who’s who. And I don’t think I want to think. Wahahah!!!

Anyway, taxi drivers are strange people. Some, are extremely chatty. Some, extremely quiet. LOL. And I somehow think that there’s a higher chance to get a chatty driver early in the morning, around 6-7am. They can really talk non-stop throughout the journey.

Or is it only me? Do I have the ‘you-can-talk-to-me-taxi-driver’ face? LOL…

Topics that have been ‘covered’ by drivers so far…

1. sg traffic condition (whenever there’s jam… this will surface)
2. some govt policy (woo-haaa)
3. working at IMH (wahsey… imagine you on the taxi, and that driver tells you, he has worked in IMH before. Then you looked at him via the rearview mirror, and he’s smiling to himself… Wahseyyy!!!)
4. romania case (zzz)
5. shooting someone in NS (this taxi driver was talking to me about the romania case, and told me that he shoot someone while serving his ns, and got into DB… -.-“)
6. ERP charges (why at certain times, taxis are not seen at some taxi stands…)
7. sg weather (lol…)

Hmmm…

OK! Time to go back to sleep! Hahaha!

Yay! Ok back to stoning…

Ok, it’s Friday!!!

I wanted to blog for the past few days, but then… Either I was too zzz to blog, or when I wanted to blog, the server decided to take a break.

And now, let me recall…

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Wednesday was ok day in the office. As usual, did all those siao things in office, and then went out to AMK Hub for lunch. Had beef noodles!! Yum! LOL. Still, I wanted to eat the beef noodles at wisma again. It’s been quite some time.

And yes, I ended up at wisma! But ate jap food instead. LOL. It was not in my plan to eat TWO bowls of beef noodles in 1 day… Ok la, the jap food. Quite nice. I liked the SHIOK MAKI. The Sotong was also not bad. The ramen… ok la. Edible.

1 funny trend. You know when a person has gone to spray some perfume on his/her hand, when he/she walks around, and for no other reason, starts to sniff at his/her hand…

Ermm… I… guilty of the above! LOL. Somehow, it’s quite…. addictive, the perfume? I like the scent! Fragrant, flowery scent, and yet, not too strong. Highly recommended. Anyway, the perfume’s from M.A.C………. zzz…

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Thursday was ok too. As usual, did all those siao things in office (eh sounds familiar), and then went out outside for lunch. Bak kut teh! Heh… and a 饺子… I was thinking, maybe, 1 fine day, I should go JB, and hunt down some yummy bak kut teh…

Dinner was at TBP. We were walking around, and realised that all the restaurants were soooooo full! So, we ended up at the food court… haha! Ate 饺子板面… wahliew, seeing double, from lunch. LOL.

Timed my home journey, from delta to teban, via public transport. Start: 2035. End: 2130. Hmm… quite fast liao wor. I should have alighted at dover, instead of clementi. Haha! But then, I did not feel like sleeping on the bus leh. I was listening to songs, and thinking about lyrics… Hmm…

And I ended up sleeping while watching the 10pm show. And I could not sleep at 1230am after that! I did not know why… doshite???

LOL… never try to sleep, before you really want to sleep. Erm.. What am I talking about…

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It’s Friday!!! Was ok too. Did unusually lots of things today! Busy busy throughout the day. Wiring, discussions, here and there. The discussion took up the bulk of the time. But at least I think everyone understood things more clearly now.

I hope.

LOL.

Lunch at seletar. Decided to try something new, and so, I ordered samba chicken cube fried rice… (ok, chinese sounded much more simpler: samba 鸡丁炒饭). Ok la, but was a bit toooo salty.

Bleah.

Then, dinner at Shokudo! Ordered lots of things! And ate lots of things! And crapped lots of things too… wahahha…

And yes, I achieved my undeclared aim, to go to Raffles City. But no, I did not manage to buy my contacts. LOL…

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But then, how come, I tend to forget minor minor things leh? I knew that it was in my memory. But I guessed it got overridden. That was not supposed to be the case.

I am baddd… badd badd…

Point noted. Now the point is even stronger in my head.

Which might be a good thing.

Yeah. I will remember.

Ok, yesterday was an ok day I guess. I spent almost $1k within half an hour. LOL. Bought THE LENS. Yeah. THE LENS.

Tamron AF18-270mm F/3.5-6.3 Di II VC LD Aspherical (IF) Macro.

What a loooooong name… zzz.

Anyway, bought the lens at AMK Hub. Redeemed the free water bottle. Too bad that the nice necklace has been fully redeemed. Aw…

Anyway, don’t have any chance to really try out the lens yet. Maybe during weekends I think. See how ba. Anyone wanna be model, or wanna go shooting? LOL…

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Ok, today was ok too. Went to AMK Hub for lunch. Yesterday was AMK for dinner. LOL. Twice at AMK already. Heh. Had beef noodles at the food court wor. I was still thinking of beef noodles at orchard though. Hmm.

Left office quite early today! And off I went, to swim! Yay! Swam 10 laps (er… for me, 1 lap = to-and-fro). Then BK with MP. Talk crap there for awhile. And then home.

MP asked me about one of my many nick changes a few weeks ago. Something about betrayal thingy. I was thinking really hard, but I had no idea what the hell I was referring to at that time. I can only vaguely remember the nick. It’s something like ‘betrayal is one thing that I cannot tolerate’.

Why did I put that nick? Hmmm… I got no idea wor.

Maybe, it’s good that I tend to forget about things easily. LOL.

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Tired wor… I had very limited sleep nowadays leh. Duno why. Hmm..

The weekend has been too cooling, and hence, not too ‘appropriate’ to be updating my blog.

Lol… excuses… I am just PLAIN LAZY.

Ok, let me go back to Friday…

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On Friday, we had a mini feast for lunch. Fish and Co. Some ordered the lunch set. Cal and I ordered the usual: swordfish collar! LOL. They served mine, with THREE, instead of the usual TWO, and cal was like, what the…

Never mind, being a very nice guy, I shared one with the others. Wahaha… (The actual truth is, I don’t think I can finish…)

Got out of office at around 3.45pm, with kk. That timing was the most sad timing. We waited, and waited, and waited, as empty taxis zoomed past without stopping. What to do, all changing shifts. Don’t know why all taxi drivers change shifts at the same time… Well well well…

And finally, we got a cab! To SLT we went! LOL… sounded exciting hor… fake 1 la… we were more than happy to escape from office. LOL.

Shopped and shopped. Bought what we were supposed to buy. Had dinner at SLS. went up to jalan jalan a bit, and bought a new casing for my super ancient 2.5″ IDE HDD. The shop keeper automatically gave me a 33% discount. Wahaha! So how could I not buy leh? I need that thing!

And then, home liao lor…

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Saturday was super sianz. It rained the whole day! I practically stoned the whole day away, in front of the TV, watching 阳光列车. Finished watching it, and starting on 阳光列车2. Hmm…

Suddenly, I was very awake at night, and so, I digged out my soldering kit, and started soldering. Wahaha…

Slept at 2am.

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But I woke up at 7am on Sunday. Damn.

Weather’s good in the morning. And so, I went out in the afternoon, with my tennis stuffs. I saw the dark clouds in the east, but I still went out. I had to go out anyway. Heh. On AYE, near west coast plaza, I saw the rain. HEAVY RAIN. Wahaha… and so, I ened up at queensway, crossed the road, took 197  back to JE, 333 to IMM. Shopped a bit. Went back to JE. Paid bills, finally. Then back home lor.

Rain leh… another good day to zzz.

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There, weekends. Ka-boom just like that lor. So sianz hor?

Hmm.. I think, I need to find… something… or someone…

And I think, the former is easier to find.