Belief@HazelCafe

Went online. Not much people around. Managed to talk to some old friends. Re-added email addresses back into my address book. Cleaned up my room. Did some re-arrangements.

Decided to add some fun to my homepage! I have added a countdown to my ORD at the top! It's already less than 200 days!

Found a whole stack of Pioneer Magazine under one of my tables. Suddenly, I remembered this back page, and I decided to scan it in! If you noticed the helmet of the driver (lower left of the V200), that's my head!

I was watching the news just now. It showed the amount of litter people left behind after the countdown parties at various places. That's a lot! Maybe they are thinking that with the amount of people around, no one will be able to say that they were littering. Or were they just ignorant, thinking that there would be those road sweepers cleaning up later? Next time, ask the party-goers to stay behind and clean up before they go or what… haa..

See? Going to talk nonsense again… a sign of loneliness, or a sign of recovery from holiday moods? Or maybe I am going mad?

Time to prepare for book-in…

OK, it's a new year. Happy New Year to all…

A new year. A new beginning. Perhaps this is what makes people so enthusiatic about it. Everyone is like screaming away, forget themselves, forget everything else.

As for me, I prefer to stay at home. Or rather, I do not have any programmes tonight. Or more accurately, I chose not to involve in any outings. I just don't feel like it.

Another last minute thing again. I will be on guard duty this Saturday. Yes, the day after battery outing. I don't know why, but somehow, the guard duty is ours. The original duty was not like this. I was not involved. I do not know what makes the planner redo the planning again. Another weekend guard… Not that I do not want to do, but I simply hates last-minute duty changes. They just spoil my day.

And according to reliable sources again, I will be going outfield again this month! No choice if the boss wants to put people on detail according to mileage. Just go. I still have 6 months more. Endure. I have already survived 2 years, so what's another 6 months? Or perhaps, I should come up with a new record system for such detail-assigning methods. I am not very happy with the current way.

Chinese New Year will be the next big event. Looks like I will have to go shop for clothes early. I do not have all the time during the last week.

Something's wrong this New Year? Maybe… but what is it?

Finally, I am going back to camp tonight! To sleep, and to run tomorrow. And most probably I will be back again! This is a do-nothing-much week.

Finally, I managed to make something which I called kueh, you know, like the one with different layers? This was my second attempt to make kueh. My mother tasted some of it, and even she said it's edible… really, it tastes almost the same! Too bad, I can't share it with whoever I want to share with… Sometimes, I do need outside ratings…

Added some more things to the main page of ELove. I had quite a hard time looking for the various resources. Quite limited actually, those free stuff that I am looking for.

Tomorrow's New Year Eve… and then, it's 6 months and 12 days to ORD…

It's ending, finally. But then, after I am out of that place, I will have no money, no food, no shelter, only my home… Perhaps I will feel a bit lost after that, but I guess I will get used to civilian life again… Nah, it's still half a year away.

More photos this Friday? Maybe… I have to use the camera anyway. I need to learn more about photography. That's one of my favourite hobbies. I love those shots that are taken suddenly. I feel that the people will look more natural, and not looking at the camera and showing all their teeth, if not fangs…

Frankly speaking, I do not really like this current layout of ChaosLabs. I may change again. It will depend on my mood. When I am happy, I love to make changes here and there. When I feel sad, lonely, or tired, I will simply blast my Creative Inspire Speakers away (provided no one is at home), listening to the radio or the many MP3s that I have(converted from original CDs which I owned… mostly).

January, February, March…

Come 9 Februrary, I will be 21. Legalised. Grown up. So fast…

I did nothing much today, but why am I so tired? Is it because I think too much? Or is it due to the weather?

I have scanned in most of the photos taken on Friday. Take a look under the Photos section. Look for 3DA BN Outing. Most of the photos look OK, but I am just unsatisfied with some, which are completely out of focus! Is it the one who took the picture, or is it the camera itself? Perhaps it's the background?

So many unanswered questions. No wonder I am so tired…

Did some changes here and there for the Elove main page. I did not upload the new page, as I still want to do some modifications and testings before I put everything up.

My eyes are shutting…. good nite…

Currently enjoying the radio on my computer. Just now, I watched Channel U. Funny show… haha.. last time, when I was at home, I used to miss all these little shows here and there. Now, I can watch it while I surf online, chat with friends, and do my work! But, there's this little interference to the image whenever I do something that will make my hard disk run. I will try to fix that problem, perhaps, by asking the manufacturer and see what it says. Oh yes, I guess I have not stated the brand and model of my tuner card. It's Leadtek WinFast TV 2000XP Expert.

Yes, at least there's radio and TV accompanying me throughout the night. At least that will keep my mind occupied. I do not wish to sit around and think about future events. I do not want to know either. The previous sentence is a lie…

Well, I shall do something that I do best, and that is to hope. Hope for the worst, hope for the best, or both.

Really, with my limited ability, I can only do just that. I can't fly, I can't teleport, and I can't tunnel my way through.

Hope that everything's fine. Hope that most of, if not all, things will be the way it should be.

If hope doesn't work, leave it to fate and destiny…

One cannot always expect things to turn out the way he/she wants. There are exceptions.

Yes, I understand that point… I am just trying to minimise the effect…

Think positive…

Well, merry christmas to me… haha bought myself something that I have eyed for a long time: A TV and FM tuner card! Now, I can listen to Perfect 10 and YES 933 while doing my things! No more Mp3s forever! No more external radios! And I can turn on the TV whenever I like! No more extra cables for another TV! No more poor reception!

Alright, my computer is now the system that I have always wanted. I can play DVDs, CDs, and I have surround sound, and now this tuner card, not forgetting previous upgrades and repairs…

Maybe… I should go find all the receipts and do some Mathematics. I want to know how much I have spent on this computer. I guess the figure could be around $2000…

Photos will be out tomorrow! If only I had brought the roll of film to develop at a earlier time…

OK, back to TV, before I go and sleep…

I haven't start listing out my project list for 2004! Maybe tomorrow?

Finally, this hectic week has passed, without much trouble. The Christmas guard duty was great! The Guard Commander bought a box of rochers for us! That day was also very peaceful. Maybe it's just Christmas…

There was some unhappiness about guard rest and guard off this morning. It's another question of being fair or unfair by our boss. We decided not to argue with him. We think it's unfair, and he think it's fair, and in the end, we all will suffer. So why create a fuss over it? I did give everyone my deadly, unfriendly, cold stare, and beat others at Chinese Chess without a word. That's just me…

Today's battalion outing was not that bad after all. We went to Marina South for some fun. We flew kites (yes, the kites did fly…), and played bowling. I managed to score a few strikes and spares, but the scores were still not that good. We took many photos too! I will send the film for developing tomorrow.

This is the start of my long off. I will be off tomorrow, on Monday and Tuesday. And Wednesday will be a half day. Thursday is New Year's Day. Friday will be our HQ Battery Outing, and that Saturday will be a long weekend. A long rest. A long awaited break from work…

4 days more to 2004. I guess I will have to think over a number of things these few days. About friends, about love, about emotions, about finance, about lots of things… Perhaps I will never find the ultimate solution, or maybe I will. Nothing is certain.

Welcome, 2004… all by myself…

Nevermind, I shall wait. I have already waited for so long, why not just a few moments more? Or will I lose out in the end? Perhaps… Probably…

Will I be ready to let go if the need arises? I don't think I will be that strong to do that… Or maybe I can, if I believe.

I really need to rest…

Watched LOTR with a group of friends just now! It was great! The graphics, the cast, the sounds, they are all beautiful! The whole show was so exciting, I did not even close my eyes! I mean, I did blink, but I did not want to lose any part of it…

Throughout the 3 hour and 20 minute movie, there were laughter and tears (I mean in the movie, there were laughter in the cinema itself, but I don't think I heard anybody cry…). I will watch it again if possible, and I am eagerly waiting for its release (yes, I decided to buy all 3 in one shot) in the near future. Yes I just love fantasy stories!

Enough of happiness. Tomorrow's guard duty day. I will have to go back to camp early tomorrow. Think I will rest early too. I don't want to become a panda.

Merry Christmas to you all. Merry Christmas to me. Lonely Christmas to me…

Let's hope next year will be a better one…

Sweet dreams…

The whole battalion went for a run at West Coast Park this morning. Just a short run at a leisure pace. Not much sweat. Or is it because of the daily exercises and games that we all had while in camp? Heehee…

While I was in bunk packing the last few items into my bag, I forgot to include my keys too! I only realised this when we finished having our breakfast at MacDonald's at Ginza Plaza. I had to call my father to open the door for me! This is just forgetful…

Yes, I survived the 1-day outfield. It was nothing much. I only realised that the page that was used for my updating of the weblog cannot be viewed on my mobile phone when I attempted to write an entry while at Lentor! I have to make some changes soon, I guess…

Christmas eve today. Most activities have not been confirmed. Let's see what they are going to do next… just wait and see… this time, the organiser's not me…

Here's this week's schedule:

Monday, Tuesday will be the proposed FUPT. I will be going, if nothing goes wrong. Then, we will have a battalion run at West Coast Park on Wednesday. They have said that there will be a CO's Parade on the 26, but so far, only HQ Battery has the date printed in the RO. 26 is also our battalion outing. Time for some fun and food? Maybe…

Yes, I will be on guard duty on Christmas! Nevermind… I don't mind, I don't care, I don't need, so, why not let others go, and exchange this duty with them? Or rather, should I say that the one who planned this month's duty had put me in such a fix? I say again…. Nevermind…

Christmas is nothing, when there's no one around to celebrate with. When no one's around, Christmas is just Christmas. A holiday. Nothing else…

How will I spend my Christmas Eve? I do not know… maybe, in camp? Or maybe, by watching LOTR? Or perhaps, something unexpected will happen? Who knows…

OK, time to go back to my lyrics… before I leave my house…