“不敢 不会 不该 不要”

Just reached home. Got out of YC at 8pm. We decided to shut down everything, lock everything, and get out of that place by throwing all the keys to the person. If we continued to stay in the container, who knew when they were going to end?

And when the person came out of the restaurant to get the keys, he said “have a nice weekend”.

What is “weekend”, I wonder? i gave him the _|_ face but I did not think he noticed it, due to the dim lights.

…

There is no weekend, when the week is not going to end.

…

There’s this farewell dinner. And yes, a few of us were not invited.

Doshite?

This is a kind of ‘drawing line’. I hate to draw lines, but, if that’s the case, draw lines ba. I don’t care already.

Everyone was behaving like thieves, in my view. Secretly gone off, hiding, avoiding…

I really give up on all of you.

And I really give up on myself too.

…

And so, lt, kk, and I got out of yc. We dropped kk somewhere along the way, and went over to bpp for dinner. Called cyh down. He did come down. Heh. Ate at xin wang taiwan cafe. Yummy wor…

It’s nice to eat together, after a tiring day. Just chill out, talk about crap stuffs, and eat. Not everyone enjoys this, definitely. I enjoy this. I don’t like to feel tired, and I still end up eating dinner alone. That’s so sad.

If you don’t enjoy the company, that’s just too bad.

…

Took 176 again. Slept all the way to JE, and decided to carry on the journey, and walk home instead.

…

不敢: 我不敢。我觉得，我自己是没什么机会的。我感觉不到希望。我总是在想，我干嘛一厢情愿地等候着。。。

不会：我不会。我不会逗人开心。话从我口中说出的，总是被忽略，被轻视。话从别人口中说出的，总是有和我相反的效果。我干嘛这么努力地改变。。。

不该：我不该。我不应该选择这一条路。上一次不是已经走过了吗？怎么还不吸取教训？我干嘛要这样折磨自己。。。

不要：我不要。我不要再像个白痴，等着某一个人。我干嘛要等。。。

。。。

我知道我在等的原因。。。

。。。

就是无缘无故的喜欢上嘛。。。

。。。

叹。。。

…

Maybe, I will spend some time later, thinking of what else to write. But I think, I should bathe first.

And maybe, sleep will be next.