Went to collect my registered mail this morning. Republic Of Singapore Driving Licence. Class 3. 01 Apr 2004.
Took down that extra ballast from my ceiling this afternoon. It was hanging up there, but I do not actually need that, so I decided to remove that. Tried out that 2 PLC 9W lamps. They worked, but one's warm light, and the other's cool daylight. What's this… another mix-up? Why can't they label the boxes correctly?
I do not know what to do with my room now. If I have things my way, I will empty out the whole room, and refurbish everything, from the ceiling to the floor, every inch, every corner.
If I have things my way, I will be able to have the fastest computer. If I have things my way, I will have some siblings to share my problems with. If I have things my way, I will have become a different person…
And so what if I have these things my way? I can't even reach out for one thing. The thing everyone called Love… (I still have EnchantedLove… maybe?)
Maybe I can… perhaps I can… I will be able to one day. Maybe 1 week later. Perhaps 1 month. It could be 1 year. Even 1 decade…
Sometimes, I do not know whether to like search engines or hate them. They give me results that I requested for, and sometimes even bothered to bring my understanding to a higher level, to inform me of things that I should not be knowing, or rather not know… Unexpected results, leading to more curiosity and problems. I don't want that. I have had enough headaches already.
Whenever I encounter this type of problem, I will feel sick, for no other reason. I will feel feverish, as if I have got myself an infection… I wondered if I am sometimes too emotional, and perhaps have a high level of curiosity. My mind keeps thinking of the unsolved problem, and I can do nothing much for the whole night. I need answers. I need solutions.
How I wish I can forget everything. Format my brain, restart it, and reprogramme everything from scratch. Maybe I will be able to function better after that, and hence relieve me of these miseries…
I wondered what am I listening to on Perfect 10… It seemed that I've been listening to the same songs over and over again… I am not paying much attention here…
If only I have things my way… If only I can…